The Ceremony
Inés Marcó
translated by Alex Niemi
CAST
Pope
Layman
Guard of the Brotherhood
Brothers of the Circle
The characters meet at the entrance of a large urinal. The Pope is waiting for them.
Before entering, the brothers greet the Pope by turning in circles and waving their hands as if dancing the tarantella.
Everyone wears paint-stained aprons.
After the greeting, the Pope bestows a brush and palette on each of them. The brothers introduce themselves and crawl one by one into the hole of the urinal.
Once inside, the ceremony begins.
The Pope asks the Guard of the Brotherhood if all present belong to the circle. The Guard of the Brotherhood makes his rounds and confirms that they do.
Pope: Dada. Dada. Let the meeting begin!
All (in a church whisper): Dada. Dada.
Pope: In this, the 92nd year of our era, we will initiate a layman to our circle.
There is a knock at the door.
Pope: Who goes there?
Layman (from outside): A layman who wishes to be an artist.
Pope: Enter!
The Layman enters, crawling through the hole. He has a tilted beret, a fake mustache, short pants, and suspenders. He is blindfolded. Once inside, they remove his beret, tear off his mustache and put him in an apron.
The brothers beat their paintbrushes against their palettes, frightening the Layman.
Pope: Before entering the brotherhood you must pass the test. Why do you wish to be an artist?
Layman: Because I am a good person of good report.
The Pope orders them to bring the linseed oil.
Two brothers hold the arms of the Layman to restrain him while another pours the linseed oil over his head.
The Layman squirms.
All (in unison): This is not a pipe! This is not a pipe!
The Layman kneels and is given his brush and palette.
Pope: Do you swear on your honor never to betray your brothers?
Layman: Yes, I swear.
Pope: Do you swear that if you do betray your brothers, you will relinquish your brush and palette?
Layman: Yes, I swear.
Pope: And lastly, do you swear never to reveal the secrets of art?
Layman: Yes, I swear.
Pope: Remove his blindfold!
When the blindfold is removed, the Layman is dazzled by a flash of light. Something spins above the Pope, who looks on, petrified. The Layman manages to make out, after a moment, the wheel of a bicycle.
All: Dada! Dada!
Pope (hitting his gavel on the podium three times and yelling with arms raised): The circle has a new brother!
Layman (murmurs fearfully): Dada, Dada.
The Layman trembles, clinging to his palette and brush.
The scene recedes and goes dark.
* *
Image: “Un cuadro expresionista” (An Expressionist Painting, 2009) by Inés Marcó
The Ceremony first appeared as part of Inés Marcó’s exhibit “The Ceremony. Paintings,” curated by Lara Marmor in June 2012 at Pan Libros, Buenos Aires, Argentina.
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